My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
