I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
