I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
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while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
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I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
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