I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
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