Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
