She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
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