dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
