it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
