I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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