Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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