We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I currently don't understand fingers.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
