Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
