How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
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