I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
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