we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize