why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize