no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize
