hell yes lets make some ravioli
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
We just shotgunned beers for America
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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