Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Randomize
