I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
