do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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