oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
