i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
