there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
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