I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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