a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
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