dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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