how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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