Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Randomize
