sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Randomize
