Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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