is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
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I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
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