brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
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