it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
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