I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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