tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
