Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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