Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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