Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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