Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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