Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize
