it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize