Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize
