mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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