I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I currently don't understand fingers.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
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