How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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