I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize