I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
