Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
