Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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